Hi! I'm Elizabeth, from Real Spanish, and a Spanish enthusiast just like you.
The first time I came to Spain was to give a talk to groups of teachers in the Basque Country. I left Toronto on a cold and miserable late winter day, and arrived in bright spring sunshine in Bilbao. Sandals and shirtsleeves weather!
That trip marked the start of my love for Spain. The teachers seemed to appreciate my work, and over the following years I was invited to work with primary and secondary teachers in many parts of the country. With each visit, I discovered more to admire: the relaxed lifestyle, excellent food, beautiful architecture, and stunning scenery. In time, I realised Spain was where I wanted to retire. I did, and I have been learning the language and adapting to the culture ever since.
Why am I telling you all this?
I’m telling you about my first trip to Bilbao because it was on that occasion that I was introduced to a woman — an important civil servant in the Department of Education of the Basque Country — who ignored my outstretched hand and kissed me on both cheeks. What Spaniards call the “dos besos” — two kisses, one on each cheek. Then I noticed a lot of cheek-kissing going on around me as people (mostly women) met old friends and new acquaintances. It took me a while, and several more embarrassing occasions when I lunged left just as the other person went right. Awkward!
When I started this blog and our YouTube channel I decided to include some videos on cultural aspects of living in a Spanish-speaking country — including customs like the “dos besos “greeting that can catch newcomers completely off guard. This is one of those videos.
Why don't I appear in the video?
The video is in Spanish, narrated by Virginia, because although I speak Spanish, my accent remains stubbornly British (my original nationality) — and I felt it was important for the videos to be narrated by native Spanish speakers, to give you an authentic Spanish-language experience. So here is Virginia to help you with this important aspect of Spanish culture (transcription below).
Hi, great to see you! Today I’ll explain the cultural norms in Spain regarding kissing or shaking hands.
In an informal situation, when a friend introduces you to someone else, it’s normal for women to kiss each other on both cheeks, beginning with the right. Men usually shake hands, although when friends meet, it’s normal to hug or to pat each other on the back. In a formal setting, such as in a job interview, it’s normal to shake hands. However, don’t be surprised if, when you meet someone in a meeting or a conference, they kiss you on the cheek… as long as one of you is a woman.
When you greet your colleagues whom you see every day, a greeting such as ¿qué tal? or ¿cómo va todo?, etc., is fine.
So, some advice: wait until the other person makes the first move, leaning towards you or offering their hand.
OK, those are the norms in Spain. If they are different in Latin America, tell us about it below! See you soon!
Have you ever experienced that embarrassing moment when you offer a handshake and the other person kisses you on the cheek? Or vice versa? Awkward, right? Tell us about it below!
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